Retired From Rushing
One of the best things I’ve ever done for my self-care was to release myself from the concept of rushing. It has done wonders for my mental health and my nervous system as a whole, the energy associated with rushing to get to any particular place is exhausting and one day in Jan 2023 I just decided I had enough. I remember rushing through the airport to get to my plane on time and decided I had finally had ENOUGH!
Generally speaking I’ve always been a pretty punctual person, but I wasn’t dogmatic about it being required. Retiring from rushing doesn’t mean showing up late everywhere and making others wait on me (because…rude!). What it means is that I plan my day with intentionality and I actively avoid overcommitting myself so that I’m able to be present and engaged in every part of my day. For clarity, I do still drive fast but that’s just because I can’t help it at this point. But it’s no longer with the intent on rushing to beat the clock (because I have to).
I understand for some, this idea of retiring from rushing seems asinine and I’d like to offer some tangible things I do to implement this in my life without being chronically tardy:
Before I agree to anything, I check my calendar first and place all agreements in my calendar immediately - this helps me minimize the forgetfulness and avoid overcommitting to a thing. I also add the address in my calendar invite (if applicable) so that I’m able to properly plan day of.
At the start of each day, I write out my obligations and think through where I need to be for each thing - If I have to be somewhere physically, I reverse my steps to map out the time needed to be there. I’ll start with the “Arrive by” feature on the maps app and always plan to arrive 15 mins early and include any other stops I need to make. This allows me to see an accurate time I need to leave by and factors in traffic patterns for a given time. I typically round backwards here when determining the time needed to leave as well, if it says to leave by 12:23 I will set my alarm for 12:15.
Once I know what time I need to leave, I think through what I need to do to be prepared to leave. If I’m also getting Kayla ready I leave extra buffer space to ensure I’m taking into account the randomness that comes with getting a toddler ready to leave the house. I typically over exaggerate here as well and ensure I have more time than not to be prepared to leave the house in a timely manner.
Bonus - If you have someone who chronically causes you to be late (child, parent, partner), be honest with yourself about that too and add buffer time there also. If one of your resolutions for the new year is to be on time more often, these are some tangible things you can do to change your habits. For starters, it begins with accepting that having people waiting on you is genuinely rude and being mindful of this and actively working to do differently is the first step. If you are chronically late, what you are communicating to others is that your time is more valuable than theirs, especially if you agreed (or picked) a particular time. Be honest with people about when you’re able to be somewhere and give them the chance to adjust their schedules as well. If you are not a morning person, stop setting early meetings that require you to be out of the house at a particular time.
I hope this helps someone make changes in 2025!